This is the bible for the people who are a little out of touch with there own kind. This is how we(the pointless and lost people)belived history to go. It started at about 500B.C. It skribbled up on a note pad something like this:

Chapter 1-

On a stormy night in baboononia a litte child was born in a hotel. When he was born a man they call Slob, the suprime ruler, yelled "Yes!I will name my child Jacoberonieumus, wait a minute that is to hard to remember or pronounce. Hmmm..... Joenobily... wait too hard to... shortin it to Joen... Aww hell! Joe! Joe that is what we shall call him." So they took their baby and ran to their car. They ran because  Margee, Slob's wife, had destroed the room in labor. As they aproced their car the owner of the hotel came out of his room with a sawed off shotgun. He spook in a low voice, he said "Get the hell back here or I'll blow our ass to hell and back asshole!" He swiftly aproched the car and blowed off Maree's head. Her bloob spreaed all over the front of the car. Then he grabbed the towel that was holding the baby Joe and shot off Slob's legs he brought the towel and Slob by the hair over to a nearby tree. There he hung Slob with the towel. As he walked back to his room he chukeled "Teach that fat assed fucker to mess with me." Later that night Joe was picked up by an old man named God, he renamed Joe to Jesus. Then the rest of the bible is just made up because they wanted to cover up the rest of our morbid past.....this is how it realy went after that...for the next few years God tought Jesus how to fight off physcos and other weird mental people who should not belong on earth. When Jesus was 21 or so God let him go out on his own. When he left he desided to go to casinos so he could pick up chicks and maybe win some money to go and buy some 40. He needed to stop for gas and when he did the cleark ran out with three foot long rusty sissors. He ran out and cut off the person next him's head. His blood trickeled down to a puddle of gas. Jesus quickly ran into his car and floored it to casinos. Once he got here he saw a man who said "Hey you wanna fuck my dog bitch?". Jesus said "Hell yeah.". So he went up to room 274 in Lexure. Some say he is still their.... If you ever go to Lexure walk past that room 274 and  if you hear some one e-mail me and write "Fuckin' a jacked off peice off shit asshole, your doin' that right now are you dumbfuck?"
Just e-mail me but you must type"Fuck you asshole. Go jack off muther fucker. Go shit and eat it.Fuck you you son of a bitch. Then here put your e-mail adress" Once I get this I will email you back by saying "What?' then return by asking the question. I love getting mail so please write. Please! Comments anything just say hi. But please, please, please! My e-mail address is [email protected]            Once again please!!!!!!!!!!